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Chapter 75: Chapter75-I only feel guilty in my dreams



Gradually, the chaos outside quieted, replaced by an eerie stillness.

I had escaped, at least for the moment, and was now waiting for my finger to heal back to its normal state.

I sighed...

"Damn, that was the most riskiest backup plan I could ever come up with. I swear, I\'ll never make a plan like that again."

I had two plans in mind.

The first plan was to intentionally tell them to stop trying to save Aeron, which would lead them into a trap.

My real intention was to save myself rather than Aeron.

I decided not to go along with them and let these guys die at the hands of that person.

If they all died, there would be no one left to complain to Marcus.

But there was a major flaw in this plan. Marcus might become suspicious of me.

So, I improved the plan.

I added that after they all died, including Zeras, I would intentionally injure myself by little cutting my leg, hands, and other parts of my body.

Then, I would slowly crawl towards the entrance of the shopping mall and collapse, forcing the guards to come to my aid.

I would tell them how we encountered the rebels and everyone died, but I managed to escape.

Afterward, most people wouldn\'t suspect me, though a few might still have doubts, but it would be minimal since I\'m an Iron ranker.

My second plan was to rescue Zeras in the end and bring him back to the mall with me.

This would likely clear my name since the leader himself witnessed everything and would be held accountable for his recklessness and the deaths of the others.

This plan appeared unlikely or even impossible because of several factors, such as the presence of that guy, the possibility of Zeras dying, and other complications.

Currently, my fingers were regrowing themselves after all those fights...

It took a minute for both fingers to fully regenerate.

The living room we were in was quiet during this time.

Neither Zeras nor I said anything after our small conversation...

I remained quiet because I was in the middle of a healing process.

I wasn\'t sure why he suddenly became quiet after that.

From the moment he was being kicked by that guy to when I saved him, he seemed fine and was talking, even after his friends died.

Yet now, here he was sitting on the floor in silence, perhaps lost in thought.

I ignored him as I didn\'t much really care about him...

Then, I opened my character profile only to see numerous messages on hold.

[Ding, Congratulations, host! Quest: [Betrayal or Loyalty?] has been completed!]

[Objective complete: 1/1.]

[Ding! Congratulations, Host! You\'ve acquired 500 Monster Essences from the Quest, and they have been added to your Character Profile!)

500!

Holy shit! That\'s an incredible amount of essences I received for this quest...

It\'s the first time I\'ve ever gotten this many essences as a reward.

My eyes were filled with joy as I looked at them...

Then, I checked my status window to see how many more essences I needed to level up.

Name: Michael Frostburne

Race: Human

Current rank: Iron.

Progression to Gold rank: 58% (1420/2500 essences)

Hmm, so, 1000 more to go...

Then, I closed the window and turned to look at Zeras, who was still seated.

"Hey, are you okay?" I asked.

Zeras lifted his face and looked at me with a pained expression.

"Yeah... I\'m okay," he replied.

Immediately, I sensed where this conversation might lead if I kept pushing him to talk. So, I said, "Zeras, stop showing your pain on your face and just deal with it."

I knew if I continued asking out of concern, he might open up and tell me how it was all his fault, or about seeing his friends die, and more.

I could help ease his pain by talking with him, but that wasn\'t typically my approach.

When I could foresee what would happen, I preferred to relax and stay calm.

That\'s what I was doing now.

Zeras stared at me with a mixture of anger and disbelief. "Why should I have to deal with it so fast? They were my best friends. I have to feel some sadness for their deaths."

What the fuck, bro? Seriously?

He frustrated me even more with his speech about friendship.

I sighed.

Looks like I need to put some sense into his head.

I scoffed. "Best friends? A stranger you just met five days ago became your best friend so fast? Stop bullshitting, Zeras. You don\'t even know the true meaning of best friends."

Zeras\'s eyes flashed with anger. "You think I don\'t know? They stood by me when no one else did. In those five days, they were more loyal to me than anyone I\'ve ever known."

Loyalty, my ass!

"Loyalty?" I shot back. "Loyalty isn\'t measured in days or weeks. True friends don\'t die for you after knowing you for a few days. They were just trying to survive, just like you. Don\'t romanticize it."

Zeras clenched his fists. "You don\'t understand! We went through hell together. Those experiences create bonds you can\'t understand."

I shook my head. "Maybe I don\'t. But I do understand survival. And right now, we don\'t have time for your sentimental crap. If you want to honor them, then live. Fight. Make sure their deaths weren\'t in vain."

Zeras\'s anger seemed to falter, replaced by a weary resignation. "It\'s not that simple."

"It never is," I replied, softening my tone slightly. "But wallowing in grief isn\'t going to bring them back or help us survive. You need to stay focused."

He looked down, his shoulders slumping. "I just... I just feel so lost."

I took a deep breath, trying to be patient. "I get it. Losing people hurts. But right now, the best way to honor them is to keep moving forward. We\'ll deal with the pain later, when we\'re safe."

Zeras nodded slowly, wiping his eyes. "Okay. I\'ll try."

"Good pup- I mean zeras," I said, standing up. "We need to get out of here soon. The longer we stay, the more likely the rebels will find us."

He stood up too, still looking shaken but more determined. "What do we do now?"

"We wait for a bit longer until those fuckers just stop searching around," I said. "Then we find a way out of here. Together."

Zeras gave a small nod, a glimmer of resolve returning to his eyes. "Together."

I sighed inwardly, hoping he could keep it together.

I tried my best to explain that those dead guys weren\'t his best friends, but he didn\'t get it.

So, I took a different approach and told him to move on to honor their deaths.

All because...

We had a long journey ahead, and I didn\'t want his sentimentality to get me killed instead of him.

After all, Sentimentality is a risky weapon that can either sink your enemy\'s ship or your own.

But...

For now, he seemed to be back on track.

That would have to do.

Then, I tossed a Gold rank healing potion to him, which I had secretly taken from my inventory, and said, "Use this to heal your legs. I don\'t want to carry around a heavy meatshield like you again."

He held it in his right hand and said quietly, "Th-Thanks again."

I replied, "No worries, keep going!"

He questioned, "Hmm?"

I responded, "Never mind."

With that, I headed to the sofa in this room and sat down to relax and take a break from all the shits happening around me.

***

After that, we waited and hid in that house for about four hours, sitting, sleeping in different rooms, and wandering around.

Then, we left that place, of course using my dash skill because I wanted to get out of there as fast as possible.

After running for an hour or more, we finally reached the entrance of the shopping mall. We quickly passed through the gates and went inside.

Once inside, we headed straight to Marcus and told him everything that had happened to us.

I was surprised when I saw his expressionit wasn\'t as serious as I expected, almost like he had thought something bad might happen.

He did scold Zeras for being reckless, but Marcus didn\'t seem as concerned as I thought he would be.

I made a mental note of that. After our discussion, we were sent to our room.

Before we left, Marcus said there wouldn\'t be a Group 8 anymore.

And then we went to our separate rooms.

I went into my room, lay down on my bed, and thought about today.

By now, everyone in this mall would have heard about the deaths of my party members.

I have to admit, I don\'t really feel guilty or sad for them, which is a bit strange.

I should have at least felt something since we were still members and we had talked just a few hours ago.

Have I become somewhat heartless since coming to this world?

Before coming here, I used to feel a bit sad and guilty sometimes.

Now, I can\'t remember the last time I felt guilty or sad.

While I was thinking about this, someone knocked on my door twice.

I immediately went to see who it was.

When I opened the door, I was a little surprised to see Lia standing there.

I asked, "Um, Lia, what brings you here?"

She said with concern in her voice, "I was just running some errands and heard the news about your group, so I came to check up on you."

She continued asking, "How do you feel about it?"

Before I could answer, she added, "Now, don\'t misunderstand. I was asking if you\'re feeling depressed or something."

Ah, she really is an innocent girl...

I put on a guilty and sad face and began my act.

Even though I didn\'t have much experience with pretending or acting, I was confident that the cute, naive girl in front of me wouldn\'t catch on, given my situation.

I said, "I do feel very sad and guilty about the death of my comrades since I was helpless. Anyway, thanks for your concern."

She smiled and replied, "No, no, it\'s just my duty as a friend to check on others. I didn\'t do much; I just asked how you were. You really don\'t need to thank me."

Friend? Interesting...

For a moment, I thought she might have actually fallen in love with me from the way she was showing concern and speaking to me.

But I was wrong.

Since she already has a fianc, I don\'t think she would consider cheating on him.

Still, someone close to her and very clever could easily manipulate her and mold her to their will, given how innocent she is.

I nodded slowly, trying to maintain the facade of sadness. "Yeah, I\'m just trying to process everything."

Lia\'s expression softened further. "It\'s okay to feel overwhelmed. Losing friends is never easy."

"Yeah," I murmured, glancing away briefly. "It\'s just a lot to take in."

She hesitated for a moment, then asked gently, "Do you want to talk about what happened?"

I shook my head slightly. "Not right now. Maybe later."

Lia nodded understandingly. "Alright. Just know that I\'m here if you need anything."

"Thanks," I replied quietly, feeling now guilt for deceiving her.

She studied me for a moment longer before speaking again. "You know, Michael, you\'re a strong person. I\'ve seen how you handle tough situations."

I raised an eyebrow, slightly surprised by her compliment. "You think so?"

She smiled warmly. "Absolutely. You\'ve been through a lot, yet you always find a way to keep going."

I shifted uncomfortably, not used to receiving praise, especially under false pretenses. "I... I appreciate that, Lia."

"You\'re welcome," she said sincerely. "Just remember, you don\'t have to face everything alone."

I nodded, genuinely touched by her concern. "I\'ll keep that in mind."

Lia glanced at her watch suddenly, realizing the time. "I should probably get going. But please take care of yourself, okay?"

"I will," I assured her, managing a small smile.

With a final nod, Lia turned to leave.

As she reached the doorway, she paused and looked back at me. "And Michael, if you ever do want to talk or need anything, don\'t hesitate to reach out."

"I won\'t," I promised softly, watching her leave with a mix of relief and guilt.

Once she was gone, I closed the door and leaned against it, letting out a long exhale.

The weight of my deception hung heavily on me, but I pushed it aside...

Living and surviving in this world requires tough decisions, and sometimes, assuming a role like this is necessary because you never know what role they might play in your life in the future.

I looked around my room, feeling the impact of recent events sinking in.

The deaths of those guys, the schemes and plans I had madeall of it burdened my thoughts heavily.

Man, a lot has happened faster than I thought it would...

But amidst all this chaos, one thing was clear: I needed to stay focused and keep moving forward.

I walked over to my bed and sat down, running my hand through my hair.

After a few minutes of adjusting my hair, I lay down in bed and closed my eyes, surrendering to the immense stress weighing on my shoulders from all this turmoil.

Then, I checked my watch to see the time...

Name: Michael Frostburne

Total Rules Broken: 1

Current Rules Broken: 0

Time: 5:35 PM

...

We arrived at the evening or close to the end of the evening in the mall, so the timing seemed fine to me.


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